Yearly Archive: 2011


Dec 20

3/1 Intro to Conflict Solutions and Personality Issues

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 In this section, we shall focus on the saying: “To Each Their Own”.   Certainly the fact that we are all unique individuals will influence our Conflict Solutions skills.  Two different people will handle a situation involving disagreement is different ways…but why is that?

What makes you the person you are?  This category in our Blog looks at the 3 main contributors to our personality: Family of Origin, male/female differences and the distinctive individual personality differences.  All three of these combine to make resolution of conflicts more complicated than we often assume.

Dec 20

2/1. Intro to Conflict and Relationship Expectations

Remember the last time you were at the movies or watched one of your favourite RTV series?  Relationships seemed to be resolved and neatly finished in that short time period.  Everyone just had things out in the open and major dramas were all magically restored.

However, we know that in real life, this is not the case; family and personality issues simmer for years of even for the lifetime of the people involved.  Violence and anger fill many hours of relationship time in attempts to keep the issues hidden, sidetracked or lost in the irrelevance of non-essential talking.  We have to ask ourselves if this is a healthy way to handle the conflicts that could be discussed and openly resolved? 


Dec 20

The Heart of Healthy Conflict Resolution

So what do we need to know to face and resolve these inevitable conflicts in our world?  What skills are we missing and need to replace with the dysfunction self-talk, self-defensive and unhealthy fight styles?  Since each person is different, this section will concentrate on how the attitude toward conflict greatly influences its outcome.

If I fear conflict because of my past experiences or the Family or Origin conflicts I may have witnessed, then my first response with be to either ‘fight or flight’.  Again, most of us have seen such reactions and how this can become the usual way to avoid the real solutions behind the conflict.  It then becomes easy to ‘sweep it under the carpet’ or to try and control others to stop the conflict.


Dec 17

What do you really believe about conflict with others?


Many of us have been ‘brainwashed’ into believing certain things about being in conflict with others.  We have learned these belief system or half-truths from our childhood and experience with uncompromising people.  These myths must be examined to see if our childhood belief still stands up to the truth in the ‘grown-up world’.

It might help to print off this sheet for your own personal remarks. Some of the destructive internal dialogue, heart lies we tell ourselves might include:

1: “I can’t take it if others disagree with me. …but the truth is …….


2: “Other people’s disapproval is hard to live with.”


Dec 09

What are your Expectations about Conflict?

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Do you have unrealistic expectations ….. or realistic expectations when it comes to Conflict Resolution?

As we begin this series on what is Healthy Resolution, our Expectations about conflict come high on the list. We all have expectations whether we realise it or not. Nowhere are these expectations more serious and complex than in the relationship with others.

Expectations can be a major source of stress in a work environment, in social and relationship issues. Emotional distress, conflicts, communication breakdowns, misunderstandings, distrust all develop from faulty expectations.

Many times, these expectations can be untrue or even unrealistic.

Dec 08

You can Learn to Handle Conflict Better!

Conflict is all around you!

Let us help you find your way through the Conflict Jungle! Today we begin this first series with an ‘Intro to Healthy Conflict Resolution’. It is important to lay down a realistic foundation as to what conflict is, how we handle it in good and not-so-good ways and what this Blog can offer you as our readers.

Conflict in life is unavoidable; it’s all around us. It would be an unreal expectation to think we could live without conflict. It may surprise you, but conflict can be a productive experience – depending on how you approach it! It starts in our childhood, comes with our jobs, it’s present in our families and all relationships. To be human is to experience friction with others.


Dec 08

Welcome to our Blog on Conflict Resolution!

Before you go any futher, please notice a new Page, listing all the Posts, YouTube Videos, Guest Posts, Worksheet and all other matierial!

So the first question? What is this blog site about?

Good Question! …….. So why is the topic so Important?

Everyone has conflict; that’s not a surprising statement! However, so many, many people are fearful of entering into any conflict that their stomach curls up in a tight ball whenever facing any form of hostility. It’s sad to have to live life that way.